Support Before Crisis - By Adoptive, Single Mom Looking for Mental Health Support for Multiple Children Affected by Trauma
When my family and I moved to Illinois in 2021 following a job change, there was an urgent need to find services for my then 9-year-old (adopted from foster care) with significant mental health needs. We were on waiting list after waiting list while our pediatrician did the best she could. After nine months of waiting, my son ended up in the emergency room and was admitted to the pediatric psych unit because his behavior was so aggressive, causing physical harm to others and damage to property. I later learned that the system was so overloaded; reaching a point of crisis was the only way he would be assigned a psychiatrist.
Fast forward two years and my daughter, then 5 (also adopted from foster care) was needing mental health support beyond what our pediatrician could provide. Again, we were back on the waiting lists while she struggled to make it through a day at school without being sent to the principal. I wondered if we would have to reach a point of crisis before we found support and how that would impact her school performance, long term. Thankfully, our pediatrician helped us make a connection with a psychiatrist who owed her a favor, and the psychiatrist has been able to stabilize my daughter and keep her progressing at home and in school. The reality shared with me is unless you have a connection or crisis, nobody under the age of 8 can access a psychiatrist in Illinois. If true, this shortage forces families into unimaginable situations and creates a pattern of struggle for children that is difficult to escape.
Our family needs a psychiatrist, as all three of my children, currently ages 6, 11, and 13, require multiple medications to manage their behaviors through the day. We also need those medications to be available on the day they are called in. We still experience too many supply chain issues, and I am at the pharmacy an average of 15 days per month working out issues or picking up medication for my children.
We also need opportunities for support and extra-curricular engagement for my 11-year-old, whose needs are the most extensive. There are only a handful of babysitters who will watch my kids for a few hours at a time. Even my family is unwilling to help because my 11-year-old's needs are overwhelming. In the past four years, I have had one weekend away from my children, and that was to attend a work conference.
